CRE — Christian Living Today

Subtopic: Courtship and Marriage (Age 14 — Kenya)

What is courtship?

Courtship is the time two people spend getting to know one another with the aim of marriage. In a Christian way, it involves prayer, wise advice from family or church leaders, and setting good boundaries.

What is marriage?

Marriage is a life-long commitment between two people before God and the community. It includes love, faithfulness and responsibilities to each other and to their family. In the Bible: "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife" (Genesis 2:24).

Key differences — Courtship vs Marriage

  • Courtship = getting to know, learning character, guided by parents/church, not final yet.
  • Marriage = legal and spiritual union, vows, co-operation, shared life responsibilities (home, finances, children).

Christian beliefs and values

  • Marriage is a covenant before God and people (the church/community).
  • Christian marriage requires love, respect, forgiveness and faithfulness (Ephesians 5:21–33; Hebrews 13:4).
  • Courtship should reflect Christian purity — avoid sexual activity before marriage (abstinence).
Kenyan law and safety ⚖️
  • The law protects young people: the minimum legal age for marriage is 18. Child marriage is illegal (Prohibition of Child Marriage Act).
  • Consent matters — both people must freely agree to marry.
  • Forced marriage and early marriage are harmful and against both Kenyan law and Christian teaching about love and consent.

Practical advice for teens (age 14)

  • Focus on education and dreams — school comes first.
  • Make friends, learn how to communicate, and respect boundaries.
  • Talk to parents, pastors or trusted elders before making any serious decision.
  • Avoid sexual activity before marriage — talk openly about this with a trusted adult if pressured.
  • Learn skills for future marriage: how to manage money, resolve conflicts, and care for a home.

Qualities to look for in a future partner ❤️

  • Faith: shares your Christian values and prays with you.
  • Respect: treats you and others with kindness.
  • Responsibility: works hard at school or job and plans for the future.
  • Honesty and trustworthiness.
  • Good communication and willingness to seek help when problems arise.
Red flags — be careful 🛑
  • Pressure to have sex or hide the relationship from parents.
  • Violence, threats, or controlling behaviour.
  • Lies about important things or secrecy about major parts of life.
  • Refusal to listen to wise advice from family/church leaders.

Role of parents, church and community

  • Parents: guide, protect, and advise their children in courtship decisions.
  • Church leaders: provide counsel, premarital counselling and prayer support.
  • Community law: ensures marriages follow legal requirements and protects young people.

What happens in a Christian wedding? 💍

  • Prayer, reading of Scripture, vows (promises), exchange of rings and signing of the marriage register.
  • The marriage is celebrated in church and then registered legally with the government.
Memory verses

Genesis 2:24 — "A man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife."

Hebrews 13:4 — "Marriage should be honoured by all..."

Short activity / reflection

  1. Write 3 qualities you want in a partner and 3 qualities you will practice in future marriage.
  2. Talk with a parent or church leader this week about healthy friendships and boundaries.
  3. Find the church rules or premarital counselling offered by your church and list one thing you learned.

Remember: Courtship and marriage are important steps. As a young Christian in Kenya, keep faith, listen to wise people, follow the law, and protect your future by making responsible choices.

👪 ✝️ ✅
For school use (CRE) — simple, safe and biblical guidance.

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